I think we should have a rant thread, where we can pour out our problems in an environment where nobody knows us. I'll start. This is probably quite petty, but whatever. I'll try to make it short.
So I met this girl and I fell in love with her. After a couple weeks of hanging out with her a lot and getting to know eachother really well, I asked her out. She said no. The next day she told me she had regretted that decision so much and that she did really like me. We hung out a lot the next couple days. Three days after this, she tells me she loves me (she wouldn't be the first girl to tell me she loves me after a very short period of time, but she would be the first that I didn't freak out completely after hearing this and then want to abandon). So things were going great for a few weeks. We slept together, we went to all sorts of events and stuff. We were interesting and spontaneous. We always talked completely straight to eachother and didn't play any games. I thought "holy shit, I actually have a legit girlfriend who likes me as much as I like her!" She told me she loved me, she wanted me to move to France with her, she even jokingly asked me to drop out of college and move now. I was the first boyfriend she'd ever introduced to her family!
So then one day, we meet up and she dumps me, just like that. She basically says "it's not you, it's me," albeit expanded and sincere. She didn't go into great detail. We already had tickets bought to a couple concerts, the first of which was the other night, so we said we'd go anyway. I wanted her back, so I thought if we talked about what went wrong there might be a possibility of fixing things. We had fallen at the first fence, and I had a suspicion that what had gone wrong was fairly petty, and that we were both bigger than it. She meant too much to me to give up that easily.
So the night of the concert came, and after, I said "can we talk about us?" So she said "sure, but my train is about to come, how about Wednesday [tomorrow]?" I said ok. When I was home I texted her to say that I wanted to talk about what went wrong and the possibility of fixing things, so she texted me back saying she would "make things clear." So I sent her a pretty long email the next day saying that I didn't think anything would come of the meeting, if I wanted her back and she didn't want that. I got a little angry in the letter, but I took great care to direct the anger at the situation and not at her. I really wanted her to understand how I felt. I put a lot of thought into the subtext of the letter, suggesting that we could be friends in the future (because that is what she wanted), and that I would just need some time to get over her and for now I would have to act like I never wanted to see her again. This letter was supposed to be my final thoughts on the matter, and the whole thing would end amicably with both of us knowing exactly what was going on.
So she emailed me back calling me judgmental for assuming I knew what went wrong (I had spent two weeks analysing every detail of the relationship, how blind could I have been?), and saying that I had really upset her and that even though she had a good time with me and I had done nothing wrong while we were together, she's really disappointed in how I acted afterward. And I felt like a massive shithead. I apologised for the email, saying that I never meant to upset her and I knew she didn't want to upset me. She emailed me back saying she knew this but it didn't change anything. I then tried to reorganise the meeting we said we'd have Wednesday, but I don't think she's coming. I'm still going to go there and wait for half an hour, because maybe she will stop by. I owe her an apology, and I owe it to her to listen to her, because maybe she did have something new to say when I just assumed she'd be repeating herself. I have fucked up.